Wednesday, February 25, 2009


as i look out the window
at dark shapes flying by,
you use it to fix your hair.

how different we are.

as i get lost in the gloom beyond
you study a perfum ad
in a magazine.

how different we are.

as i sit here alone with my thoughts,
you take a sip
of your bottled water.

how different we are.

as this train sweeps me away
you're taken too
from home to school.

how similar we are.

No, Im Just Not That Into YOU

i got a text today from a highschool friend asking if i had dropped off the face of the earth, since she hasnt heard from me in awhile. no, i had not died or disappeared, or anything along those lines, i had simply failed to get back to her. multiple times. the point is though, with popular forms of communication today, i can avoid someones attempts to get a hold of me. i wont return an e mail, or disregard a wall post on facebook. i will click ignore on my cell phone when someone calls, or "accidenally" delete a text. these things happen all the time. whoops?

i am not a bad friend. i really do care. really. its just that with so many ways to contact a person, it can be a little overwhelming. everything is so instant, so in your face there every second, and i frankly dont like my friends THAT MUCH to always be in contact with them. if i did, we would be living together. or somehow find a way to be surgically attached.

and any way, a wall post? thats how you want to ask me how i am? are you even sincere in asking? or a text to see if im still alive? what would you do if i didnt respond? just assume the worst and text someone else to see if they've heard the same? i would mcuh prefer an email; let me know how you're doing, give me a chance to gather my thoughts and respond. or make a phone date; take time out of our day to catch up.

i recognize how important it is to stay in touch with people, i sincerely value my friendships with others, and i know i have a choice to do away with texting and facebook and email, if i really dont want others to have so much access to my life. i guess sometimes i feel that instant attempts at communication has expectations of instant response, and that i cannot guarantee to ever deliver. i did text my friend back to say i was alive, and ask her how things were going, and a conversation via text ensued. but then is that really and truly communicating with someone? or just instant gratification of a technological variety?